Kephrid Born

Kephrid began his journey in a hole. He saw the strands all
around him as if to look inside himself.

                        KEPHRID
                This is lovely.

                        VOICE
                Tisn' tit?

                        KEPHRID
                What is it?

                        VOICE
                It came from Bladdar but I don't 
        know what it is either.

                        KEPHRID
                What's Bladdar?

                        VOICE
                A place.  Actually it's a region.  
        I've never been there, I just come 
        from there.

                        KEPHRID
                What do you mean you're from there, 
        but you've never been there.

                        VOICE
                Ok so where are you from?

                        KEPHRID
                I don't know.

                        VOICE
                Ok, so you don't even know where 
        you came from much less if you've 
        been there or not.  Just because 
        you're from somewhere doesn't mean 
        you've been there.

                        KEPHRID
                I'm confused.

                        VOICE
                Me too, but I think the only way to 
        get unconfused is if we talk our 
        way out of this place.  What's your 
        name?

                        KEPHRID
                I don't know what my name is.

                        VOICE
                I don't know mine either.  How 
        about if we call you Kephrid.

                        KEPHRID
                Why Kephrid?

                        VOICE
                I don't know.  When I saw you, 
        that's what I thought in my mind.

                        KEPHRID
                Ok, so what's your name then?

                        VOICE
                I don't know but I want you to call 
        me Voice.

                        KEPHRID
                Works for me because that's what I 
        was thinking you were anyway.  Why 
        can't I see you?

                        VOICE
                I'm not entirely sure.

                        KEPHRID
                Do you have eyes or ears or a nose, 
        legs, arms?

                        VOICE
                I can see you and hear you 
        obviously, but I'm only smelling 
        rich metals burning.  I don't think 
        I have arms or legs because I've 
        moved some stuff already with just 
        thinking about it moving where I 
        wanted it to move.

Surprise Visit to parents at church

Deron and I had planned this months in advance and were extremely pleased with the results.  We had a great time and could think of nothing better as a gift to my parents than to shock the heck out of them at Church.  It was a fun-filled week of riding Deron’s 4-wheelers, visiting with family and of course, eating an insane amount of delicious food.

Thunder

Running as fast as my legs could go, I sunk into the thunder

Growing tired and weary, brain hurting afraid of a blunder

Focused on shipping and texting and not wrecking

The way I slept last night, oh, it’s got me necking

Ouch, that hurts

To Toast a Town

Years ago, I strolled the streets of Sun Valley, Idaho.  I felt protected.  I thought the future was sealed.  You cannot go to this city without an overwhelming romantic wave crash against you – comparable to walking on a beach but avoiding the sand.  Not going to happen. Now, that I’m married with two children, I want to take my family there.  I want that electricity mandated by the city’s environment to ignite my future’s purpose again.  I remember little else from that visit long ago.  Only the romance. A toast to you, Sun Valley, ID!

Remarkable

Time to run, time to lose
Time to eat, time to snooze
Time to be nice, not mean
Time to be lean, not green

Have you had a remarkable day?
Have you lost yourself in play?
Growing riches within your mind?
Blowing britches in kind?

I like to run and it feels good
But not until I’m skinny and wood
Getting there with light and focus
After all, no one really knows us

Bread gone, spinach here in tow
Lemons and Mushrooms, some cilantro
Ice and cranberry juice, onions and olive oil
Monterey Jack packs, salmon in foil

Arms

I refuse to register my arms. They’ve become fatter and I don’t want that tracked… Not to mention, moderate carpal tunnel in one wrist. Next thing you know, I’d be getting spam wanting me to buy arm products. It’s already started with the Nair and Deodorant commercials. Moreover, I’m not registering the two (Grizzly) arms in my freezer; They’re stamped with FDA already, isn’t’ that enough? Even if they weren’t, it’s not like I have Mountain Lion arms in my freezer. I understand what the founders meant when they said Bear arms.

Job Hunt

Making copies of your life into a paper fill
Green little monsters rapidly moving in
Typing and fretting, it’s exhausting to find
Pressured by well-wishers and wallet alike

Damn this, I’m going home, I’m going to roam
Sitting and surfing, praying and calling home
Lying in the sun for fun, I run
Hands across the counter beat the drum

I’m on the hunt, but not really, I’m waiting
I’m flaking and shaking, but not really, I’m skating
I’m on the hunt but for what, a snot, a rope?
I’m hunting without a gun, maybe a stick, nope!

Maybe some relief is on the way, I get a call
Mr. Regal, Mrs. Callus, when should I fall
Today is the day; I get the notice, the rice
I knock on the door dressed in my ice

Elite

In a world where pleasure is criminalized
In a world where pain is glorified
I died, I cried but I didn’t lie on the side
Take me for a ride on your kite

The elite fleet stares at your feet
The cheat meets you on the beat
The eel reels on his heels before his meal
It steals as it feels orange peels

Today it pays to lay and to lay you must pay
Our fate with Kate is too late
Brace the ace in the face of lace, set a pace
Take a break before you ache from steak

Oil boils your curls in foil
Curse the verse of the nurse
Hurt Bert and be curt when you flirt
Stop the cop and flop on his top

Pressure and leisure feathers the weather
Neither the ether nor breather keeps Heather
Come for fun with your bun in the sun
readily and steadily knead your beads

When We Wed

I don’t want to see you listening
I don’t want to hear you seeing
I don’t want to taste you feeling
I don’t want to feel you tasting
and I don’t want to smell you at all

Your skin sees my ears
Your eyes taste my nose
Your ears feel my fingers
Your nose hears my eyes
and your tongue smells nothing

But how can we live, go on pretending
delicious excitement
unsightly moaning
loud drinking
coarse odors

with all we dull our senses, we haven’t a thing to bring or sing to the king
shoulders taste ok
tongues see ok
ears smell ok
noses hear bread but is it dead in the red bed when we wed?

Sorry Small Man

I’m sorry you’re small, not tall, not thick
I’m sorry you’re obsessed with lack of d_ck (your own)
Peeny small man, your jealousy is despicable
You’re not smart and you’re not slick

I’m sorry small man, your mind is injured
I’m sorry dolt, you prey on unaware minds
Spend your time aching to destroy others
While you frown in the mirror at your ugly face

Small man, you were not given tools, you’re not fortunate
Your hatred of yourself will never benefit anyone until you’re awake
Your hatred of others will never benefit you until you’re under
Hey small man, your control of others will never be

You’ll live in pain in misery all of your days
You’ll always look to cut others to the bone
Because you see, little man, you have no bone
spine or you know the other kind

Little man, I don’t wish you well
I wish you nothing but continued humiliation
You know the kind you get when you look in your mirror
Oh I forgot, little man, I’m not sorry

Looney

Chunks of life disappeared before my very eyes

On my way home, contemplative, looked to the skies

Brightness covered my memories but something dark too

Shadows of lost time, shadows rang loud and true

The mystery of this headache puzzles my cells

The wind at my back, pushing me forward tells

Schedules have changed, faces have aged

Is that you, it’s me don’t you know, are you caged?

I have run, I have walked

I have crawled through these halls

I have stayed, I have prayed

I have scratched up these walls

Another world, another life, another death, another story

I’m too far gone, but I want to start again towards glory

A silence hovers like fog, like a rug, like a blanket

Sentiment rushes, it kisses, on a page, just a sank bet

I have run, I have walked

I have crawled through these halls

I have stayed, I have prayed

I have scratched up these walls

The precious past seems looney now, how could I.

Years of this unknown laboratory, thought I would buy

Starting again, the mess, the greatness, the magic smile

Earth stops then, now, and again, but it’ll be a while.

I have run, I have walked

I have crawled through these halls

I have stayed, I have prayed

I have scratched up these walls

-Jason L. Scarabin, 15:35 PT, Sat. 03 March 2012

Sajon’s Diet

Sajon’s diet: 259 lbs on April 18, 2004 to 212 lbs by June 2004 and kept it off for a few months until breaking from the diet.  This is NOT comprehensive or absolute.
Food is pain (when you abuse it).  Repeat this phrase in your mind because YOU have abused it and it has made you unhappy.

  1. Do something that makes yourself hideously unattractive; i.e., I grew my hair long (since cut it) and dipped tobacco (not recommended).
  2. Small portions on everything.  Do not stuff yourself EVER.
  3. Weigh yourself every day.  If you did not drop from the previous day, you did something wrong and must reduce portions.
  4. Fast for 48 hours. This means ZERO consumption of anything including water (NOT a drop) or anything else.  Break this fast with a Granny Smith apple… wait an hour then bake the Salmon described later.
  5. Liquids Under NO circumstance including holidays and celebrations will you drink outside these specified drinks or your choice of an equivalent in calories and carbohydrates.  If you refuse to give up beer, drink Aspen or Miller Lite. Drink lightly.
  • Water
  • Green Tea (Celestial Seasonings Antioxidant) with Lemon
  • Coffee (Black with Equal if you like)
  • Cranberry Juice (Low-Carb usually designated on jugs or labeled as Diet)
  • Grey Goose Vodka (Kettle One is the ONLY acceptable substitute)
  1. Meats Fish, Chicken & most seafood prepared anyway you like including fried but always use Olive Oil or butter.  Red meat is fine about twice a month prepared anyway you like.  Salmon must be a staple because of the Omega-3 Fatty Acids.
  2. Vegetables Onions, Mushrooms, Garlic and Lettuce.  Cook these with Olive Oil or butter except the lettuce.  Eat lettuce with croutons (if you like), cheese and Ranch dressing (NOT lite) every day.  Tomatoes are fine, but I do not eat them regularly.
  3. Fruit Granny Smith Apples & Lemons.  Avoid oranges and pineapples.

Habits Pick a habit that consumes at least 2 hours a day that is productive, consumes your mind and feels good.  Ask me in private what I did and do.

Salmon recipe (L.B. taught me 99% of this recipe): Bake on 350 for 30 minutes on top of aluminum foil after seasoning it and plugging it with garlic cloves.  Remove salmon, turn it over, remove the skin, place it on a NEW sheet of foil, and season the new side.  Broil for 10 minutes, slice a lemon and spray the salmon with it.

Snacks Feel free to add good quality chocolate to your coffee or have Hershey’s Kisses with Almonds, no-salt peanuts and low-sodium Ritz crackers with cheese or Cream Cheese.

Salt NEVER add salt to your meals.  Shop for low-salt products.  Swiss cheese seems to have the lowest amount of salt.

Vitamins I take one Centrum Carb Assist vitamin daily with food.

Shopping Grocery shop often.  Stop eating out PERIOD.  D.M. taught me to stay on the outer edges when grocery shopping.

Broken

Broken, torn, hurt and troubled
minutes come like thorns
gravity a nuisance, time torturous
relief comes only in dreams and fluid 

Pushing and pulling waiting for a break
fast feet and quick sniffs ride it out
urges and luminous outbursts displayed
soft tears peek through under pain 

a tiny light sheds in the upcoming watch
wait… a sparkle lights up your veins
fire burning deep but safely relaxing
quenching the hatred of father time 

pure bliss now it’s magical enough
bringing peace within what existed
nice to know and careful to follow
this gentle breeze is all you needed